I Started Winning When I Stopped CompetingFebruary 19, 2020
A little over three years ago, I was hired as a nurse Liaison, which was a RN position and I was a LPN for which I felt unqualified! I applied because I wanted to be a part of a competitive national rehabilitation hospital so I could develop big boy corporate data analysis marketing skills and further my clinical knowledge. Imagine my shock when I found out I was hired for which I had no Bachelors or a four year degree.
I was anxious. I doubted myself. Honestly, I was a little fearful. The tasks we needed to complete were things I had never done before on such a big corporate level. How was I going to compete in the market along such educated colleges, with professional certifications and extra credentials ? Imagine me rolling up with my LPN license, although my experience is what saved me. What would happen if I failed? What would happen if they asked a question I could not answer? On top of that anxiety, I was silently fighting the lie in my head that I was not good enough. Not good enough at work. Not good enough at home. Not a good enough wife. Not a good enough mother. Not a good enough sister, Not good enough at ministry. Not good enough at anything!
No one was knocking down my door or ringing my phone off the hook to ask me to speak at their event. I hadn’t finished my book (still haven’t) Just a pile of journals. I was re-gaining the weight I had lost. I had faded into the background at work; I no longer was aggressively perusing work, I fell into auto-pilot. I wasn’t leading a bible study small group like I had wished and couldn’t seemed to get into a teaching ministry at my church, except through praying during the Daniel Fast, my church is starting a Theology School in the spring and God has been telling me to sign up, of course with no extra funds to do so; I was tired of that and wanted to move to the next phase. I was also facing the possibility of added work responsibilities on top of being a full time mother to 3 children and a wife to an amazing husband.
While I wasn’t mad at God because some of my issues were self-inflicted, I did want some relief. I did want God to make it all go away and give me a fresh start. I wasn’t complaining, but I was slipping into a nonchalant state of mind. I was just existing and hiding. Trying to motivate myself to get out of the funk I was in. With a teenager, pre-teen and 5 month old daughter, I was just surviving.
Have you ever felt like that? If so, then you can relate to not only me, but Gideon. In Judges 6 of the Bible, we find the Israelites are oppressed by another nation, yet again, because of disobedience. They began crying out to God.
He selected and called Gideon to be the deliverer of His people. Gideon was so afraid of the situation they were in that he hid. God sent an Angel to Gideon who addressed him as Mighty Warrior. Gideon was not excited about the way he was addressed. Not only does he say he is the least in his family, but he also begins a rant; telling the angel all of his concerns and venting all of his anger.
After the back and forth between the two and the very apparent disbelief in his abilities, Gideon finally consents to be the deliverer after asking for many signs to make sure God is calling him. It is a great story of one person confronting and dealing with their anger, doubts, and fears. It is a story of one person who decided to do it ANYWAY! I encourage you to read the story in its entirety (Judges 6-8). There is so much we can learn from Gideon’s story. I will talk about three lessons we can learn from Gideon that will help us gain or re-gain our confidence so that we can achieve what we have been selected to do even though we may doubt our ability. You may feel unqualified and not called, but God takes the unqualified and qualifies them and calls you to follow Him !
1. We Must Renew Our Mind.
When Gideon started his conversation, there were many doubts. However, by the end of his conversation, we find Gideon in a posture of worship. Judges 6:19-24 shows that Gideon renewed his mind. In verses 13-16, Gideon was doubting not only himself, but God. However, as he continued talking with God and staying in his presence, laying his concerns before God, his mind was transforming. He asked God for a sign; God provided the sign; and he moved out, but not before building an altar. An altar is a place of sacrifice and worship. Gideon laid his doubt and fears on the altar and exchanged them for worshiping God! In the beginning Gideon was doubting, by the end of his encounter with God he was worshipping God! Gideon’s mind was renewed!
A renewed mind creates a renewed strength which, in turn, creates renewed courage (even if it starts out in the dark where no one can see it). As you continue reading the story in Judges, you will find that Gideon went against his own family to obey God. The Baal and Asherah altars he destroyed belonged to his father. After destroying them, he then built an altar to God on top of the destroyed altars! Another sign of worship. Yep, His mind was renewed! He went from questioning God to Worshipping God.
2. We Must Pray.
Gideon’s mind was renewed and it happened with prayer! Prayer changes things! It changes the situation. It changes the perspective. It changes the reaction! You go in one way (angry, scared, discouraged), but you come out another (peaceful, courageous, inspired). In my opinion, chapter 6 is one long prayer; because prayer is a conversation with God, right?! When you pray without ceasing, you are aligning your heart and focus to the voice of God. You can hear God’s commands and you act accordingly. Fervently praying.
3. We Must Act and Trust.
As Gideon kept doing what God told him, God revealed more for him to do. He kept doing act after act after act. God was speaking and he was obeying. As he was obeying and doing what God told him, his trust was developing. Your trust can only develop as you GO!!
Trust is built as you act. When you move God moves. As you continue to move, you continue to see God move in MIGHTY ways; thereby increasing your trust in Him. I trust God to provide for me with the 90% because I tithe the 10%; and He has! I trust God go before me when I speak, because when I speak he has always given me a word. I trust God to give me an encouraging word to speak to people, because I go to that person to speak and he has done it over and over again.
Yes, trust is developed as you move. Because when you move, God moves. When God moves you see the miraculous things he does. You start saying wow!! Your trust builds and it makes you step out there again.
Let me encourage you my friend to neither wonder nor worry about whether or not you are qualified or good enough. You are! God doesn’t call the qualified; He qualifies the called. If you get the vision, you will follow faithfully. He is a way maker.
YOU ARE QUALIFIED !
You are a vessel of honor; sanctified and fit for the Master’s use. – 2 Timothy 2:21
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “Plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. – Jeremiah 29:11
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. – Proverbs 3:5-6
You are strong and courageous. – Joshua 1:7
You are part of a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation. – 1 Peter 2:9